I do know fidelity, I do respect the truth. Its just that they are not my number one priority. I will not choose loyalty or fidelity at the cost of my happiness. It was not the bike, nor the gifts that brought me to you. It was your presence. I need someone beside me all the time. I need your personality, your presence to awe me to stunned silences. He was right; I missed the whole concept of being with someone, rather than that person.

I will not meet him this time. Not because I'm scared. I'm scared as hell, but that would never stop me. I just don't wanna ruin those memories. But he wants to. It will do good for him to erase them. To paint me in the darkest light. But I can't do that to me anymore. I will not go down while trying to pull someone up. I should have learnt this lesson long back when Shubho was drowning in that lake and I tried to pull him up, but fell in myself. No more. It's my life. And I will be selfish about it. If it's food I need, I'll snatch from your mouth. If it's money I need, I'll trick till i have it. If it's sex I need, I'll seduce you or anybody that I fancy. Those are my vices and I accept them. In fact I more than just accept them, I revel in them.

One more thing; I'll never make any more promises. I suck at keeping them. Because at that moment it really does seem to me that I'm gonna keep them, like there is nothing that's gonna stand in my way. But things change for me. Yes they do. I'm that fickle. Another of my vices. Another of my prides.